To be honest, Days 8-10 didn’t really differ too much from Days 4-7, except we added the ridiculously horrible fiber drink back in with breakfast. Day 8 started off a bit rocky as Day 7 was, if you’ll remember, the Super Bowl, or The Grand Day of Advocare Cheating, as I like to think of it. Basically, I woke up the next morning with a face as puffy as the Michelin Tire Man, which, after a week of flushing toxins out of my body and one day of stuffing them all (and more) back in, wasn’t much of a pretty sight.
It’s a good thing I work from my couch.
Day 11 started the Max phase, which pretty much means your body should now be in such a state of no-toxins-ness that the Advocare people now deem it ready for an assload of vitamins, an amount of which Boyfriend purports couldn’t possibly all be absorbed each day because there are SO MANY, so we most likely just paid for a bunch of supplements we just turn around and pee out (…every hour on the hour due to the amount of water we’re drinking).
Plus there’s an okay-tasting meal replacement shake thing for breakfast, which isn’t horrible if you blend it up with some ice and fruit. Not the best thing I’ve ever tasted, but not complete shit either, so I guess that’s saying something?
On Days 12-13, Boyfriend and I went to French Lick, which was my somewhat secret birthday gift to him. Between winning and then losing our asses at craps, we went to this super delicious steakhouse in the resort (oh yah…I’m eating meat again. Advocare + Pescatarianism is just a smidge too much health crap going on at one time in one person’s life. Plus I remembered meat tastes good, so, there’s that.), which meant I had to have wine, and we couldn’t pass up the lobster bisque, and the oysters really needed some cocktail sauce (which has ketchup which has sugar), and who knows what they cooked in/put on our filet mignon and asparagus (I’m assuming butter. Remember butter? Butter is good.), and then when we went back to the craps table I had to have more wine (which could possibly account for us not walking away in time), which altogether means we cheated, again. Whoopsie.
On Day 13, we went skiing, my first time ever. Therein, the Olympic dreams I had been dreaming for approximately two hours were dashed.
But that story’s yet to come.
After our glorious cheat day, all bets were kind of off. We had Taco Bell on the trip back from French Lick, and I’ve happily added wine back into my regular diet. We’re still sticking to most of the eating plan, shakes and vitamins but are now more in the mindset of mindful eating instead of deprivation. I mean really, skip ketchup because it has sugar in it? That’s no bueno con mi. (If that was Spanish gibberish, I meant to say it is no good with me. We’ll just leave it at that.)
And since I can no longer exercise thanks to the Ski Run of Death (more later, swear), I’m kind of over this whole health kick anyway. Plus, can a girl just get some carbs?????
Unrelated: LOOK AT THIS ICICLE BOYFRIEND FOUND ON OUR TREE. More like an iceberg, amiright?